If you need somebody to persuade you to cease utilizing social media, I’m not your woman. I gained’t inform you to delete Instagram, to restrict your TikTookay use with a timer, or to sentence society for making it such an enormous a part of our lives. While there’s nothing improper with these approaches and every include their very own advantages, in the present day, I’m sharing a distinct strategy. Social media is already an enormous a part of our lives, and I’m not one to waste my vitality making an attempt to swim upstream. The solely method to transfer ahead is to work with it by maximizing the rewards and minimizing the dangers.
How can we make that occur? Social media positivity. I’m sharing how one can increase the feel-good results of social media (they do exist!) and supplying you with ideas that can assist you really feel extra connected, empowered, and impressed when utilizing it.
Featured picture by Michelle Nash.
What is social media positivity?
If you step away from this article having learned one thing, I want it to be this: Using social media in a passive way is a key contributor to the feelings of depression and loneliness we often associate with our feeds. It makes sense logically, but it’s also backed up by science. When we lurk, when we scroll for hours on end without having a single conversation or interaction, we end up feeling emptier than when we started.
Social media is meant to be social.
Humans are wired for connection—we’re social animals, in spite of everything. When we use social media to attach on a deeper stage, we really feel much less alone and it really helps our psychological well being. Remember: How we use social media influences the feelings we expertise when scrolling.
Don’t Be a Voyeur
A couple of years ago, I listened to an interview between the psychologist and author, Guy Winch, and Esther Perel, a leading psychotherapist. Their conversation forever changed my social media habits. This was one of my key takeaways:
Guy: There’s a lot of research about what it is about social media that creates loneliness, and it comes down to how we use it. In other words, it’s the passivity with which many people use social media. Passivity, meaning they just scan other people’s feeds. They’re not commenting, they’re not posting, and they’re not interacting with social media. They’re just using it in a voyeuristic kind of way.
Esther: And why does that produce loneliness?
Guy: Because you’re actually not interacting, because you’re not getting feedback on you.
Engage, Engage, Engage.
If I follow you on social media, trust that you will hear from me eventually. It doesn’t matter if we only met once, if you have hundreds of thousands of followers, or if we haven’t spoken in years. I can’t consume without engaging, especially after hearing the words above. It’s one of the reasons Diane Cari and I’ve an inside joke and the way I acquired my very personal private e-book suggestion from Ryan Holiday. Take it from somebody who is aware of: By persistently speaking and fascinating with others’ content material (in a sort approach that respects boundaries), your scrolling periods shall be reworked for the higher.
Show The Real You
There’s a quote I really like from Arlan Hamilton, writer of It’s About Damn Time, that at all times jogs my memory how essential it’s to point out up each on-line and in actual life as my true, genuine self: “Be who you are so that the people who are looking for you can find you.”
We won’t ever be capable to seize our “real lives” on social media, however I don’t know if that might be wholesome both. There are issues which might be too non-public, too private to share. And in any case, most of us attain for social media to be uplifted or impressed, not introduced down by different individuals’s issues. But there are easy methods we are able to peel again the curtain and present a bit little bit of #realreality.
Posting an image of your messy kitchen proper after you submit an image of a stunning meal hits totally different. These little bits of actuality look like nothing, however they convey that there’s MUCH extra happening behind the scenes that you simply don’t see.
Limit Social Media Around Loved Ones
I am SO guilty of this. I’m dripping in shame as I admit that I often catch myself scrolling socials right next to my husband in a zombie-like state without noticing. Time passes by in a flash, and I’m left feeling so empty, lonely, and even a bit depressed. Sound familiar? Mental health researchers call this phubbing and have shared that after we use social media round family and friends, it promotes emotions of loneliness and depression.
Spread Social Media Positivity
A real praise that’s particular and out of your coronary heart could make somebody’s day, week, and even change the best way they consider themselves. Remember: Your phrases are highly effective.
Something I promised myself a very long time in the past is that if I see one thing stunning, I is not going to maintain my tongue.
Whatever you name the alternative of a social media troll (a social media fairy?) is what I purpose to be. An accessible approach to do that in your individual life (and one in every of my favourite methods of spreading social media positivity) is to depart aggressively variety (it’s a factor!) opinions on Google if there’s a restaurant, retailer, or espresso store the place I’ve had a very great expertise.
Use Social Media To Know Yourself Better
Ever save posts, videos, or Reels without ever referring back to them? There’s a treasure trove of inspiration to be tapped into! I like to go through my saved folders and make sure things are organized in a way that inspires me. I constantly import my favorite images to Pinterest or remove things that no longer excite me. It’s so important for us to have clarity about the things that excite us.
Get Educated
There are countless amazing accounts to learn from on social media. You can get inspired by fun new recipes or dive deep into NASA’s latest discoveries. Some of my favorite follows are Maria Popova, creator of The Marginalian, Wired UK, and All You Can Face.
Use Social Media to Express Yourself
We every have a deep should be seen and understood—it’s a human fact. Amanda Palmer defines this fantastically: “There’s a difference between wanting to be looked at and wanting to be seen.” Expressing ourselves and sharing our lives is an attractive factor and there’s no disgrace in that.
Use Social Media as a Creative Outlet
Do you have a hobby you’re passionate about? Starting a new Instagram or TikTok account dedicated to your niche hobby can be so fun! Most of us have many interests and it can be hard to connect with our family and friends about this without feeling like a bore. I’ve started more Instagram side pages than I can count and I can confidently say I wouldn’t be writing this if it wasn’t for that creative outlet.
Unfollow Wisely
If someone has been giving you a funny feeling or their content no longer resonates with you, unfollow them. To be clear, I’m not saying that you should unfollow people whose opinions differ from yours. In fact, I try to practice the opposite. There’s much to be garnered from perspectives, ideas, and experiences that contrast your own.
It’s a bit of a careful dance, but trust your intuition and unfollow anyone who makes you feel that your life isn’t good enough or that you’re less-than. If their content sends your brain into a negative spiral, it’s not worth the drain.
Share Things That Inspire You
We all influence. To influence is to be human. We’re doing it already and we’ve done it way before social media took over the world. The key is remembering that you have a choice: How do you want to influence people? Owning this power and choosing to use it for good is the best way forward. I’ve stumbled into wonderful parts of the internet because a friend chose to share something on social media, and I hope to do the same for others.
Those are all the social media positivity tips that help me scroll my feeds and post with confidence, compassion, and a whole lot of inspiration to guide my way. Any ideas I missed? Signed, your social media fairy.
